The infamous resolutions…….

The tradition of New years and resolutions go together like peanut butter and jelly or even better busting a nutty on her belly. After numerous failed attempts of my resolutions last year I found I should drop the standards to boost the average. While I really could care less about being able to succeed at my resolutions it at least gives me something to strive for other than criminal or sexual acts. So here it goes….

1.) No more tickets, last year this lasted eight days so in light of my usual activities I’m going to go with no more tickets for at least six months

2.) Find love, not lust. I’m not counting on this going through

3.) Create more art, The adventures of stickman and Penis had a short run, I think I need to bring it back

4.) Become less fat, I tried losing some weight and found it’s allot easier if I just try to become less fat. Scales went away after two things, one, when I quit dealing and two when I was going through my closet looking at clothes that would never fit again

5.) Find a new job, well sometimes the grass isn’t greener on the other side. I did get a new job last year should have said no to that one

6.) Go somewhere exotic, stripclubs while entertaining and sometimes exotic lack two essential items, photographic memories and on most vacations you know what you returned home with

7.) Brew more beer, I see no reason why this should not be a resolution but rather a staple of life

Well that sums up how I will be living 2012, oh i did forget

8.) Finishing building four wheel drive vehicle for the Apocalypse, we’re all gonna be dead by this time next year